Explain to me.

Im seeing more and more women express the phrase "im tired of being single" nothing wrong with that, but they are acting as if they are going to die if they dont find a mate soon, and it does become a problem when you express your bitterness about it, critique-ing and watching others relationships, letting the thought of being alone take over your social life, (blowing facebook and twitter up with your antics)  dont nobody wanna c and hear all of that shit!! Explain to me y u want and need a man anyway? Then Explain to me how getting one is going to saitsfy your happiness or complete you, and good luck with that explanation because you dont NEED a man and accomplishing one wont all of a sudden fix your "internal happiness issues" Ladies you may not want to hear this, but you have to work on you first, or you are always going to be in the "im tired of being single" situation. Women these days have unnecessary baggage (as do men but this is a message for female not male) The "I want a man to take care of me (literally) problem" The "you ALWAYS think he's cheating " problem The "I just cant find the right one" problem, and that was just to name a few, instead of having a troubled dating life why dont you try working on you getting a hobby and just going with the flow because the dating will come along I promise. For  starters men dont want to be hunted (for the most part) they want to do the hunting. Very seldom are you going to find a man by chasing him (but not in all cases.) you showing desperatness will guarantee you to be single. Women always say "men aint shit" "men play too many games" "he wont commit to me", (for 1 u chasing boys & "that nigga" not a man) but remember a man will only do what you allow. Somewhere along the way some things got misconstrued but lets see if I can help you get in touch with what really happend, some one stop setting standards and whether it was man or woman we may never know but im gonna point out some things on our side. Women started being cheap or forgetting their worth for better words like letting men disrepect one time too many, by not speaking up..going with the flow if you will. By "playing positions" (that never really works out) now with all of that being said women go back and say the men are the problem and for some of that they are but we all must be held accoutable. If you let him stop in and out like your house is a due drop inn then thats exactly what he is going to do, if you allow him to call you at 3 and 4 in the morning to c you then thats what he is going to do! and im not blaming them for it, you stop setting stantdards and thats what you get. exactly what you put on the table nothing! A vibe is felt in a matter of seconds and a relationship standard is set not too long after that now let that marinate...if you approach a man with no confidence in you, no pride in you, no direction in you well thats how he looks @ you, yes men pick up on that type of stuff so even if thats not who you are that vibe was already felt, now here comes stage two you only been knowing him for a week and yep he's arlready had the pleasure...now the relationship is set, so he goes along about his business and that venture was that venture, this is the womans first mistake you call him up questioning him as if he were on trial where u been y u aint returned my calls blah blah blah his response is usually "I didnt know I had to check in with you, I thought we were just hanging out" THE REASON WHY YOU DONT HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE MAD AT HIM!! YOU set that standard,  if you wanted a different type of relationship you should have created it. Most women learn from these mistakes the first time around but then we have the repeat offenders who want to blame every one but themselves then they become bitter and unnaproachable. fix you first whenever there is a problem or issue look at yourself first to make sure you aint trippin, or if youve just been wronged but you may c that there was something you could have done differently, but in the midst of feeling that way you just keep jumping head first relationship after relationship not even giving yourself time to stop and evaluate or even think. Explain to me what the problem is in being by your self to work on and better yourself and then try dating again, im sure it would be a whooole different ballgame. Then we have the women who act like they have to have a man oh they gon die without a man..your gonna b ok sitdown somewhere! Most of these women go get  HALF ASS men anyway im talkin bout the ones who dont have jobs or if he does then no car or vice versa,  nowhere of their own to stay, kids all over the place...really you would rather put up with this then wait for the right one? Your balls are much bigger than mine LMAOOO! I cant put up with foolishness like that arguing about stuff you seen on facebook or things u found in his phone now once again, expain to me y you would want to put up with this instead of being single?? You dont even have to tell me because I already know there is something internally worong with you and you will continue to travel down this road because you wont take the time to evaluate, I wrote this blog because it makes me sad that there is a generation of women like this and yes most of them are mothers so iamagine what they're teaching their offspring. Ladies Explain to me what a man can do for you that you cant do for your self (besides sex..and thats for the listeners cause personally he cant do that for me if he cant do nothin elese) Most women these days take care of home most women these days work and take care of their mates (insane) so again what can a man really do for you. let me explain: I get my hair done my nails and toes I bought my own car (yes cash) I can pay my own bills and any and every thing I want or need I can provide that for myself no issue...some men out there cant do all of those things for me are you getting my drift now?? If a man cant do for you what you do for you then why do you need him? Men want you to perform wifely duties but act nothing like a husband, but these days instead of putting the situation in its place women play along and get their feelings hurt and become bitter im not saying this is right for men to do but it happens, It is past time for you all to wake up especially those of you who are mothering, and those of you who are damned near 30 on the same ole marry go round its not a good look honey, not at all. further more I think its a blessing to be single you dont have to answer to anyone, you can keep an open roster and you can most importantly have fun yall make single look scary, hell thats probably what happend yall scared all the others into wanting to be in a relationship. Every thing is cause and effect apply that to your dating skills and see what happens. My personal prospective I could give about a man right now, im trying to make it out here so me and my people wont have nothing to worry about and ill get back to all that relationship stuff some other time. From what ive witnessed it aint nothing out there to be chasing anyway, men aint offering nothing no more anyway so why brood over that?? It simply isn't worth it..for me to open up to a man he gon have to be ALL THE WAY RIGHT and be able to do for me what I do for me, I dont care how nobody elese put it you partner and marry for stability first love second (old saying) you guys have a lot of heart I wont let a man get close to me for nothing because most of em aren't offering nothing but sex and if you cant offer nothing but that I dont want you any how. So in the meantime im just gon get my money up and continue striving for me and mine and he will come ...doesnt that sound so much better than hounding?? I want a MAN so im more than willing to wait for him when im down I want someone to lean on if I happen to lose a contract or lose my job I want my man to be able to hold down the fort in its entirety, I want a man that will let me know I never have to work again if I dont want to (even though that will never be the case) I want a man that will be able to teach my son how to be a strong black man/stand up guy and that takes time to find but I dont want to deal with a bunch of immature boys in the meantime, I'd rather be by myself than deal with that type of nonsense, I think more women should adopt this motto & then go share so we can at least have a ripple effect, Im willing to wait HOWEVER long I have to in order to find the right one, my mommie didnt get married untill she was 40 but he is everything she ever wanted him to be, she didnt go find foolish men and try to change him thats impossible ladies...so now that you have read this try to explain to me why you THINK you need a man?


Soyez libre en vous

Whats Mine

There is an issue at hand that nobody will speak aloud about, I personally don't like how a certain "Klan" of individuals are being treated. Walk with ur head up and your back straight is what my mama instilled in me from day 1, but I feel like I'm being hated and mistreated for carrying it out, she always told me that i would be judged off of my appearance and how i chose to carry myself, now that I'm older I know that's because people don't actually take the time to get to know one another anymore they just make up their own scenarios according to your life silly huh? As I got older I just rolled w the punches that my mom set for me, I dress myself nice I keep a nice car and a place to call my own. I'm just not sure why and how this stupid epidemic came about: I keep my hair done, my nails and feet done, and I drive a decent car, normal right? Wrong according to those who are not happy from within I can only speak for myself here but a lot of us young women (MOST BLACK) have to deal with this stupidity/negativity, other women, (or people in general) passing judgement giving u the "evil" stare down, the cold shoulder or having an attitude toward you. This is at school work (yes work) and in life itself. The irritating part is the jealousy/hate itself jealousy is a sin by the way and we will get back to that shortly,so if you keep yourself up you have to deal with sly talk being treated funny and even fighting in some cases (getting the drift on the sin yet?) the part that puzzles most of us is the simple face "you don't even know me" you see what i have and how i carry myself and take it as a threat but why? You do realize these are all materials things a? I'm sad that things have come this down to the wire people judging people with no background on who the really are as a person, not just what you can see. I'm certain they don't think of anything else when they pull this BS, they cant even fathom how broken I am, or the troubles I face EVERYDAY the fight I fight second by second, when they see my designer purses and clothes that they are just that...material things I hurt I cry I fight I struggle and pray like anyone else y crucify me for keeping myself up to par and to take it a step further I have no choice but to present myself that way I'm a BLACK young woman so I'm dammed if I do or don't, taking it back for a second if i had a million tattoos and wore quick weave ponytails and all types of "urban" (in their words) hairstyles, and if i came to; half dressed they would treat me different (i know ur eyebrows are raised be patient) I've noticed that the people of society today are scared of the "Strong One" you would think a well spoken black man/woman well groomed, preserved what have you would be accepted but were not; and there is a simple reason why. They are scared of us threatened by us, and not yet ready to accept the new and improved. They may even feel like were there to take away from overcome them, or excel further than they ever have. Meanwhile the "urban" one is being waited on hand and foot not because they take more to their liking or their better, but simply because they don't expect ANY thing from this group of individuals, they feel like they can befriend them because they are not a threat, they treat them kindly because they feel like they are beneath them, and can never surpass them (snakish huh) I said that to say it needs to STOP you never know what people are going through dealing with or what kind of baggage they are carrying around: My case I'm judged by my own by others man or woman white or black because of my material belongings though, I have to deal with things from all four directions and handle my  run (life) luckily I can deal. It is hard but that's a black woman's life been that way looks like its gon stay that way; I'm just here to say cut the shit EVERYBODY! stop pointing fingers and judging you don't know what the hardship of the next man/woman. Mind your own business and live for you and you wouldn't have the time to do these things, it takes being happy within. you for you to be free within you (Soyez libre en vous) the issue is society itself is always worried about the next person and not self, you get so caught up in what the next person is doing or trying to do and lose yourself. There is enough to go around for everybody. people get jealous and think others are trying to block their shine take away from them or their worried about somebody doing better then them when I'm only out here to get Whats Mine I'm not here to take from anybody else.
















I didnt feel like punctuating today ill fix it later




TianaMarie

What An Art

Today is a beautiful day...the lord allowed me to be part of it & 4 that I Thank him:

Today its freezing outside. I dont feel as on top of things as i should; but y? Today is just another day to help me focus on my everlasting days! Today im not the richest but i can live, I can make it, yes as of today im scoundroling to make ends meet, to make things work, numerous days I have made sacrifices to ensure this happens. But it wasn't today that made me realize im better than what im doing, better than what im being. better than just "making things work" Although this is an Art in which I admire very dearly. This is the art that my people built our foundation on, this is an art that is no stranger to my beautiful black kings/queens, this is an art that will linger in our culture for many years to come. It is a beautiful art yes....but it is not an art that any of us need to abide by; this art shows how strong/smart we really are. but we should only paint that picture when need be. that reason is because we can dig deeper and find that magical
canvus, the blank canvus the free canvus. the canvus where we pursue and create. In order to get to those flashing lights u must love your canvus, share your canvus ask 4 help on your canvus strive for that canvus to be great to be mindblowing, extravegant, strong; but most of all appealing to you. If we can scoundrel to make art. We can work to build a Beautiful canvus as it is our Lives.